Dancing in the Storm - My Nia Practice, Part 2

I had a little epiphany a day or 2 ago. Years ago I realized that I process the information I receive from the intensives I attend when I'm ready.

My epiphany was that I also process Nia classes the same way.

I've been teaching now for about 8 years and I just fell across this one!

My teaching model has been for me to gather the information, digest it and share it in such a way that it fits the context of the class, the demographics, timing, etc. From aerobics to Nia that really didn't change. What did change was learning to teach from my personal somatic experience as well as my experience stemming from the other 3 realms, mind, spirit and emotions.

Talk about "when the student is ready"... I'm not sure how ready I would have told you I was when I stepped into 2011, but I know now that this year with it's brutal storm of 'opportunities for growth' has created change like few other periods in my life.

It is my conviction, therefore, that I came to my little discovery due to the fact that I have been living so profoundly immersed in my experience.

I didn't fully trust the process (that the information would come to me when the time was right/when I was ready for it) during and after my first White Belt intensive although that week was still life-changing. At Blue I did not have anything practical I could draw on, but I was committed so I extended conscious trust. The key, for me is not so much expecting something but waiting without attachments.

Simply put, I now trust that my being is processing from the minute I step into the experience (intensive or class).

I take some information immediately with me in the form of thoughts. I may acknowledge how interesting, mind-blowing, or fresh a bit of information is to me. I may have physical sensations related to the experience: fatigue, achiness, tension, weariness, heaviness, lightness, pressure or ease. I may feel overwhelmed emotionally, or elated, or confused, angry, frustrated, invigorated, disappointed, relieved, etc. I may be receiving from my spirit realm or it may be quiet; I may not understand what I am receiving, nor what I should do with it. All of that is my way of digesting. For a few days after I get home I feel out-of-place, out of 'routine' and wonder how I'm going to teach my next class with a head that is either so full I don't know how I'm going to organize myself or I feel so empty I don't feel ready to teach. The feeling of emptiness is typical for me. It's my response to being overwhelmed. It's as though everything simply leaked out of my ears to relieve the pressure! If I don't panic and go searching, my brain will organize and my nervous system will re-boot and I'll be ready. (I've also noticed that I am particularly quiet for 2-3 weeks following an intensive. My cueing is very concise, almost taciturn.) 

When I take a class that inspires me, I will often go through a similar digestion experience. This week has been an example. I took class from Kim last Saturday. She shared Zensation! I hadn't taught Zensation is a long time but my body remembered. I left stimulated and decided to teach it the next day. I was my "bubble" of Zensation.

A couple of days later, it dawned on me what was happening.

I've shared Zensation twice since Saturday. Interestingly these classes felt grounded and soundly tight-but-loose, but the lovliest part of it was the ease with which I could deliver them. These classes flowed. Music played, my body moved and shared, my mind and spirit shared, within the form of Debbie's choreography and with my creative freedom.

I have committed to Nia not only as a fitness program to share but as a lifestyle practice. This said, I fully realize that due to my commitment, I'm going to visit my comfort's edge on a regular basis. Getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. These days I'm not only waiting for it, I am inviting it. What I'm saying is that I have opened the door and invited the Storm in. Stuff happens all the time to everybody everywhere. I could deny the Stuff, I could take a breath, close my eyes and wait for it to pass, pretend it's not happening, ignore it or I could steel myself against the coming challenge so that I won't feel/receive the message; new wisdom. I've done that, all that. Now, I'd like to move forward.

This year, I've turned to look into the Storm.

(I am not claiming bravery here - not at all - nothing could be further from this truth.)

How else will I see , if I don't look into the tempest?

Last year my Brown Belt intensive left me open, strong and wounded*. Like every intensive for me, I'd opened a door I couldn't close so I had to walk through. This year has been walking through the door, manymanymanymanymanymanymany doors.

(*For clarity let me say that there was nothing in the Brown Belt intensive that wounded me. I had revelations and experiences that brought information to the surface. The processing choices I made resulted in wounds - often my experience.)

To say that I am surprised to recognize the face I see in the mirror is an understatement!

Truthfully, I'm a hoping that the Storm will slow and even quiet for a little while. As grateful as I am for all of the gifts I have received this year, like a broken bone, I need time for remodeling to occur.

Let me also clarify that I am not being put-upon - I am not having life done to me. I have been an active participant here. Even though I have no control over my mother's complete loss of mobility in mind and body and my father's faltering memory, I have chosen how to manage these happenings in my life.

My way to slow and quiet the Storm and remodel? Go back to school (for Plan B) - a         16-week Anatomy and Physiology course offered in 8 weeks and preparing for the Black Belt intensive a couple of weeks after that! I am deeply and desperately in love with the subject matter and the human body and it feeds me and, happily, it feeds my classes - my students and Nia. Nice symbiosis.

I've got bones to memorize!

Btw - did you know that Vitamin D, synthesized from cholesterol through light (you know, that 15 minutes of UN-sunscreened time we spend OUTside [ideally, though any light source will do]) is considered a hormone responsible for getting calcium (from our diet) from the intestines into the blood and to where it's needed?